Tuesday, June 01, 2010

I'm still married to a crazy man.

Our next chapter in the ongoing saga. So, for a living, the husbeast spends his time measuring things in hundredths of a millimeter. Thousandths? Hm. Hundredths, I think. At his new job, he made them buy new scopes that were more accurate. Just today he sarcastically referred to a ruler as 'a wooden stick'. As in, "at least they weren't measuring it with a #@#(%* wooden stick".

Enter our villain.

Plastic calipers. I'd been using them for super high-tech stuff like measuring beads to make sure they'd fit through the orifice of my spinning wheel. I'd compare different kinds of jewelry bits to see if they were the same size. You know, really horribly important stuff like that. World's riding on the accuracy. I could probably do it with a wooden stick, but I'm lazy. That sort of thing.

Well, since we started sharing this work table, the husbeast has had to look at this affront to his sensibilities. Sunday he couldn't stand it any more, and came home with two things allegedly for me. (I suspect they're for his own peace of mind.)

This, apparently, is crap. But easy to use. You turn it on, put whatever into the clippy bit, and you get a readout on the LED display in metric or imperial. Right. But it's crap, so he also got these:

Digital calipers.

Because there'll be an industrial accident if the gears don't fit through the orifice on my wheel, don't you know. These work much like the 'crap' above, but much more accurately. You can see they're sensitive enough that they're kept in a padded case. (Alwen, they are NOT from Starritt. But if I demanded some, I bet he'd get them.)

Now I'm wondering what in hell I'm supposed to use these things for, because I'm sure as hell not planning on inspecting any nuclear reactors. He can't make me. Zoomies give me hives.

Pretty sure I'm keeping the plastic calipers and framing them, though. To hang up in my lair. Or maybe the living room.


I'm spinning! I've gotten the first third of the singles spun. It'll be plied with purchased threads, so I've got just the one ply to spin.

AND I've finally figured out what camera setting to use to get accurate colors. That looks right on my monitor.

This stuff is a batt or roving (I can't tell) with rayon icicle in it; it's a shiny thread that is not quite as thin as silk. It's also got silk in it. And carbon fiber. So I've been picking fibers out of my eyes all week. The husbeast always loves it when he finds fiber on his work clothes. Don't know if he's had to explain it to the guys he works with yet; the Navy dudes were quite boggled over the idea of a spinning wheel.


The other night, the Goober's stuffed animals had a tea party on her bed.

I went in at bed time, sighed heavily, and started picking up stuffies and tossing them into the stuffed animal bin.

Didn't see the cat until she meowed at me. I'm pretty sure she was worried I'd throw her too.

Sekhmet, you stealth fucker.


amy said...

Cool! I'd be measuring everything, just for fun. I bet my 8yo would LOVE those.

The bed, so easy to clear... it's the floor full of Legos that's getting me at the moment. I can't even get to the bed, really.

Alwen said...

The micrometer I use on knitting needles measures down to hundredths of a millimeter.

shiversOhhhh, the accuracy! It's so shiny!

Alwen said...

Cripes, the verification word heard me! It was "anting", but now it says "quivorin". Spookeh!

Catie said...

the cat looks comfy :)

Louiz said...

mmm, Kathryn's floor looks rather like the Goober's bed...

Frame the plastic ones - the husbeast can always turn the picture to the wall if it bugs him!

Donna Lee said...

We have sets of calipers in the 'man cave' so Pk can measure to the thousands of an inch. Wooden things must be measured accurately! I don't want him to see the digital ones. He'll want some.

Roxie said...

I married a precision machinist. He has his own calipers "because the ones at work are crap." Everytime he wants me to get accurate with measuring, I take a piece of yarn and show him how stretchy it is. "Approximate works just fine."

caryn said...

I still have a wooden slide rule and an antique wooden yard stick. I remember how to use the yard stick.

Barbara said...

You mean my paint store yardstick with the worn and rounded edges isn't accurate?!? No wonder the nuclear reactor I'm building keeps going offline. Shiny, indeed!

Sometimes crazy men are the best. I'd have jumped, shrieked, and peed if the cat had done that to me, but then I startle easy.

Nice tea party, Goober, too bad the cat crashed it and then your mom sent all the guests flying.

Emily said...

Excellent husband....Good thing you love him. Onviously he's head over heels about you.

=Tamar said...

I have two sets of calipers with digital readout. The one I bought new is junk - the reading changes according to how hard I press on it. The one I got at the thrift shop works beautifully. There are no markings to indicate where they were made, drat it. But I like my quilter's yardstick marked in thirds of inches.

Amy Lane said...

LOLOLOLLOL!!! Go husbeast... keeping the world safe from nuclear meltdown, one bead/gear thingy at a time. And yeah. Frame the piece of crap. (The color is so awesome in the mystery batt... mmm...) And yeah. Squish--she has tea parties like that all over every couch in the living room. We sit on the floor.

Carol said...

I have a pair of the digital calipers of my own too. My son gave them to me for my birthday and I love them. This was a couple years ago because I'm a dental technician. When you make teeth you carve them in wax first. You have to be very very accurate so that it will fit the patient. Then the teeth are cast in gold or pressed in porcelain. It's fun. I couldn't live without my digital calipers. Enjoy yours!!!